Tied the knot back in October. Here we are, happy as can be, frolicking through fields of bubbles, friends and family. Ah, blissful marriage.
Fast forward to last night’s lovely tea time. It’s become a routine night cap for us throughout our Whole30 journey. Helps communicate to my brain that the food fest is over (and to stop begging for more), and to my body that it’s time to transition to the land of the horizontal.
In a true treat yo self moment, we made the last minute decision to upgrade the experience with my grandmother’s china vs our go-to oversized bulky mugs. We were watching Alias Grace (add it to your list if it’s not yet there), so it was certainly quite fitting.
And another hit on the fast-forward button, to this morning. I hear what I immediately identify as china breaking on our counter. A soft, yet painful “ping” that could only be the sound of beauty shattering. Followed up by a few restrained expletives, in hopes my cat-like hearing wouldn’t pick them up.
Which leads us to this.
And the moral of this tale is that marriage if fragile, just like this tea cup, because I’ve filed for divorce.
The end.
Ok, holding off on the divorce part for now. But, I did consider it during the silent treatment I was laying on heavy in the aftermath. Before you begin passing judgement on my ability to appropriately react to situations and manage my emotions, this is the only tea cup I inherited of its kind, we’ve used it, well, never in fear something would happen to it, it holds all sorts of sentimental value, and you know I have a thing for flowers. Look at that shattered flower. Ugh. The heartache!
If you’re following our daily musings, you know I’m always looking for signs delivered from the universe, in hopes I can mold them into a metaphor about what life’s currently serving. And in an effort to try and spin my china-shattering morning from a divorce, to something of value, don’t mind if I do.
Last night’s read in Food Freedom Forever was Section 3: Acknowledge When You’re Starting To Slip. Throughout the whole book, Melissa hammers home in a scream-from-the-rooftops very subtle sort of way, that what we’re in the midst of, the reset, is just one part of this continuous cycle. Compared to the common misconception that it’s 30 days and you’re out. At its conclusion, you’re fixed, good as new, and ready to fall face first back into [insert the most sugar dense thing you love] because you’ve done such a great job for the past 30 days and you friggin deserve it. Werk!
On the contrary, friends. What we’re about to embark on is that NeverEnding Story (who’s ready for #falkorfriday tomorrow?!) and truth be told, no matter the speed at which the Tiger Blood runs through our veins as we crush our final week, we will inevitably sink back into our habits. Some much sooner than others, and at varying degrees, but eventually we’ll start to feel the effects of the slippery slope. Trick is, how to keep a hawk eye on the signs that tell you a slip is nigh and arming yourself with some tools to combat the bloody thing.
As I read this, I couldn’t help but direct some rage at Melissa for raining on my parade. I’m feeling all sorts of jazzy over here on Day 24, and am in zero amount of hurry to get back to laying in own sugar sweats post gluten-free cookie binge.
But, as always, I ultimately find truth in what she’s throwing down. It’s tough to disconnect from habits wound tight with emotion, and when we’re riding without our training wheels come day 31, outside the structured rules, and we engage with the real world on a more regular basis (yeah, I’m still pretty hermit-y over here), and holidays come ‘round, and we head out for our well-deserved vacations, and our food freedom is tested, it’s totally reasonable that the slip from the glory, that is the final week of a Whole30, would be a thing.
Tiger Blood, in all it’s fierceness, can be fragile. Fleeting. One moment it’s fully intact, the next, with just a small slip, it’s cracked right down the middle (thank you, thank you … metaphor fully realized at this point). But, the bright spot in all of this? We simply reset once a reset-worthy slip occurs. Maybe a mini-reset, a week, two weeks, whatevs. You call the shots. And then reintroduce again. And then flex those “worth it” muscles as you live your own version of food freedom. And rinse and repeat as needed.
Idea here is that the more often you repeat the cycle, the slips become less frequent, food freedom part lasts longer, and the days of you left helpless in the depths of the sugar dungeon are few and far between. In other words, it gets way easier. Less rollercoaster-y. And way more sustainable.
I find lots of comfort in the idea that we can simply return to our current safe place when things go sideways. This happy, structured place where Tiger Blood flows, where we can piece together anything that may have broken in the slip.
p.s. Tara’s on the mend. A slow mend, but a mend nonetheless! She’s working her way from turtle to pug blood in the search of the infamous tiger’s. It’s a must read!